You’ve made it! It’s finally over, all the years of late nights on red bull, pimple breakouts from the stress and all the early mornings just so you can get a park has finally come to an end. You have fully graduated and are now ready to step into adult hood, but hold on a second! If you have just graduated from UWA then you need to ensure you end it with a bang! Below we have complied five ways for you to let loose UWA style before you are finally an adult 🙁
You have spent hours upon hours of your time at the holy of holies the UWA tav. Splitting jug’s with your mates has always been a tradition, best part is you never had to pay, not because you were the big dog on campus no, as soon as it was your turn to pay the next round you would be off to study at the library. So go back with your mates and enjoy one or six more beers at the ole tav, just make sure you actually pay for a round this time.
The four letter word that all uni students know, GOON. You may have never got your chance to show your athletic talents off at the uni games, but by god you know this is your time to shine. And whilst a respectable adult would never drink such a vile liquid the bond you have formed over the years with this sweet nectar demands you to take part in one more game. Go forth, rally up your squad and prepare for a tournament on par with that off the gladiators. Only one will be left standing.
Burn it, Burn it all!!!
The amount of money you have spent on textbooks…..100000000000010100…….the amount of time spent reading them textbooks…0…I hate all my text books and I know you do too. On day one you forked out all your summer job money for books as thick as the bible just to never be used. Only one thing to do with those retched parchments, burn them, burn them all. Yes that’s right burn it up and make a huge ass bon fire. Dance and chant as you give homage to the uni gods that your time has come to an end. Maybe even sacrifice a virgin engineering student.
Wednesday night at Captain Stirling
Captain Stirling or more simply cap s is the one place all UWA kids go to party on a Wednesday night and so should you, I mean you only graduate once right. The years of slavery were oh so soothed by a night at cap s listening to niggas in pairs each week. The herds of cows (students) that migrate from their pens (trinity house) are all a part of the cap s experience. Go there, get drunk and annoy the overly strict security just one more time for us…Please.
Get a stripper
Yes yes I know what you are thinking of course you recommend a stripper, well we are talking about celebrating right? And we all know that to take celebrations to the ultimate level you need to see some flesh. Years spent locked away in your room taking notes has left you sexually frustrated, and hey if you were the big dog at UWA then this is the only way to prove it.
- 09 March 2016
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